Cipher

Siva in Indian means the creator of all living things, but also has the aspect of the destroyer. 
Cipher means zero. It's really the same thing.  

That way they won't get conceited when they reach the top or despair if they hit the bottom. Every day is a new start. 

Siva (Jake) & Cipher (Roy) are identical twin brothers. They became famous by their childhood acting success. Now they share not just a face, but a single identity. Trading off attending school and acting auditions, it is nearly impossible to tell them apart. Anise is a schoolmate and good friend of the twins. Though she discovers their secret, she values friendship (Friendship is the highest form of respect there is.)  and just waits until they want to tell her the truth themselves. She is close to both brothers, but something more is growing between her and Cipher. Due to her in their boundary, they enter a new phase of their lives and begin living separate lives.
We hated it when we got compared and ranked by adults. We got along great when we were just the two of us. 
Two individuals with the same face. They're conscious, in fact overconscious, of each other all the time. They love each other, vying for parents' attention and love. The underdog desperately wants to prove that he also has things to do well. The top dog is also deprived too early of being a child. Both of them are being hurt, thinking that adults like the other. 
It's eventually a story of twin brothers getting mature and independent and thus individually standing on their own feet, going through love and loss. The two who sinks into their own world and estranged themselves from society finally come back to live together with others.

Siva: If Anise and I were hanging from a cliff, which one would you save?
Cipher: Anise. Then I'd come back for you. 
Siva: But I'd already be dead.
Cipher: Then I'd just jump after you. 

Siva: He cried first, so then I couldn't. Ever since we were kids, everyone always picked Roy. I feel like I never want to see him again. And yet I want to see him. (Siva doesn't reveal his emotion in public. He feels awkward and uncomfortable with smiles and tears. He seems to think that he has to be strong and become his brother's keeper since Cipher begins to rely on him. Poor him. He could be viewed lifeless, but do consider what he's gone through. Go Siva, hang in there. I'm on your side.You're responsible and unselfish. Jake, it doesn't have to be always you who make a sacrifice.)
The various occurrences. The strange coincidences that happen in our lives. Sometimes it seems like God is moving one of the game pieces. Should we be angry or grateful? One feeling can determine your entire life. 

Alex Levine. It's a guy. Pretty boy. 

Do we ever have a friend that lives up to our ideals? We influence each other and change.

I don't want to be the kind who says nice thing to someone's face and talks trash behind their back. (How noble!)

The more you get to know someone, the more you get to know yourself. 

Cipher: Old things aren't just "things." There is a history in every scratch and dent. Sort of like people. After they've worked so long, you can't just toss them because they are no longer useful. Can you? (Cipher is true to his feelings and instantly expresses his emotional ups and downs. How comfortable! On a side note, I guess now I can understand why my mom keeps things piled in my old room. It's literally become a storage room. I throw old things away and buy new things while she cherishes the memories things have.)
The more I talk with Anise, the further away Jake gets. It's like she's creating a divide between Jake and me.

Anise: If I ran across something like that again, I'd probably still jump in. I love it that you can just say what you really think! Even if it's the total opposite from me, I still love it! (Anise is naive, athletic, and above all thoughtful. A funny anecdote: a boy who she secretly liked said she looked like a girl when she was little. What I still like about America is this aspect: tolerance. Things are accepted though people don't agree or approve of them. Being different is acceptable. It's not viewed wrong as in Korea.I do hope that more and more people look inside me.)

I was dying to buy a bunch of cipher pictures like the ones below. These were sold from a street vendor right outside my high school. They were tempting, but I had no money to buy them. I didn't have enough money to buy reference books for studies back then. I didn't know what the manga is about. I didn't even know it's Japanese. Cartoons and arcade games were strictly prohibited by teachers. They were evil things that were only for delinquent teenagers. But I finally put my hands on those things at the time when nobody dared to do that: the summer of senior year before the competitive college entrance exam. 

I'm very happy to be able to finally read the manga these days through the Internet. I'll post as many pictures as I can. Belated consolation. 

  

Basara (Tamura Yumi) + The Bridges of Madison County

It's even before the first volume ends that I'm drawn to the comic book, Basara. It's like an epic story about a girl-Sarasa's revolutionary battles after the catastrophic fall of the civilization in Japan. Her twin brother, Tatara, who is prophesied to be the child of destiny, is killed by the Red Army and she pretends to be her dead brother to fight against the tyrannical ruler, the Red King, and brings back independence. Sarasa and Shuri (the Red King) deep in love are devastated when they know each other's real identity.

Everyone has survived but Ageha. The character of "trial and sacrifice for an unrequited love 시련, 희생, 보답받지 못하는 사랑." He sacrificed himself to rescue his loved one. He knew he wouldn't come out alive. He knew that she is the one. She's worth dying for. He's dead, but is and will be alive in her heart all the time. 

Once we meet, it might only be for a moment. Perhaps there won't be another chance. Even though you're far apart, you and him will definitely be doing your best! Your hearts are at the same place. In the same era. Pursuing the same dream. That is fate. True respect for someone can only arise when you meet them 그 사람을 소중히 만들어주는 것은 만나는 그 순간뿐. (Volume 12, Copper Ch 2 - Standing on Egg)

I've always thought there will be next time when it comes to people and relationships. But the manga made me realized that  there might not be. There woun't be the next time in this world of uncertainty. This very moment I see the person is the right time I have to do my best for the person. Now I'll say even a little thing like "good morning" more honestly with a bight smile. I don't want to regret later on.

You are unable to see the person again though you miss her.
You try not to see the person again though you don't forget her.
I've met Asako three times.
I shouldn't have seen her the third time.
그리워하면서도 한 번 만나고는 못 만나게 되기도 하고,
일생을 못 잊으면서도 서로 아니 만나고 살기도 한다.
아사코와 나는 세 번 만났다.
세 번째는 아니 만났어야 좋았을 것이다. (피천득, 인연)

I like two scenes in the movie, The Bridges of Madison County. One is when Francesca guides Robert to the covered bridge. He makes her very comfortable and she becomes herself. Long-lost herself. He gradually helps her unearth herself, which is forgotten in a busy, daily life. The other is the tearful moment. Robert waits for Francesca in the rain, but she doesn't leave her husband's car. She grabs the door handle, but she stays there. She looks out of the rainy window and tries hard not to have her husband notice her sorrow. The actor and actress's performances are exceptional.