College years were the best days of my life. They were enjoyable and carefree. Best of all, I learned a lot of things that I couldn't learn from books and lectures in class. There were exemplary friends with different majors and interests who were struggling to live better lives and try to reach helping hands to underprivileged people in every corner of society.
But, in retrospect, we, maybe I, lack of something important. It's a pity that I thought some people were wrong because they took a different stand. They were just different. I thought I was old enough to make right decisions back then. But sadly I wasn't. I was too naive and didn't know how complicated things were in society. They weren't as clear as math problems.
We kept telling each other it is people that are important. People should be around you though what you try to achieve is not successful. The words were told repeatedly and thus worked like brainwash. It seemed to be echoing in my head, not in my heart.
Like I found myself lost in directions after graduation, most of the friends did. Some of them seem to forget the better life we talked about. I hadn't tried to contact them because I didn't want to get disappointed in their change. I had been in a cocoon where I met with people with the same (or similar at least) ideas and opinions as mine.
Time passed, but present I don't seem to get evolved from collegiate I. I hate to admit it, but I put down people who don't their work well. I'm not broad-minded enough to embrace the mistakes and delays they make. Besides, why do I have to accept people who seemingly have jealousy and malice towards me? I don't want to be a person who judge people, but I think I am now.
I know the answer, the correct answer. I know how to treat people nicely. What matters is the practice, not the theory. The lifelong goal exists in becoming a better person by cultivating myself in response to various experiences and relationships. Life is an adventure full of unexpected things and people. Life doesn't turn out the way I expect, but I have to take it the way it comes to me and make the best of it. Back to the college days, I have to believe in people. I will.
There was a line in a poem I read in the 7th grade textbook. "Just smile when I'm asked why I live." Confucius said, "朝聞道夕死可矣(아침에 도를 들으면 저녁에 죽어도 좋다)."
<끌리는 사람은 분명 있다, 임무경>
‘사람 참 좋다’라는 평을 받기 위해서는 인간적인 매력부터 키워야 하고 일을 할 때에도 잘난 척해 보이지 않으면서 일을 잘하는 사람으로 비추어야 하며, 아부 없이도 윗사람에게 인정을 받아야 한다. 요즘은, 평생직장의 개념에서 평생직업의 개념으로 바뀌어 가고 있다. 즉, 직장에서 오랫동안 버틸 수 있는 힘은 갈수록 약해지지만 직업세계에서 돋보이는 프로의식은 어디를 가도 빛을 잃지 않는다. 직장에서 인정받는 대리나 과장 등의 직급은 그 직장에 먼저 입사한 날짜와 여러 경험과 맞바꾼 보상일 뿐이다.
직장을 그만두면 직급이 주는 보상은 그저 추억에 불과할 뿐이다. 직급이 따라주지 않더라도 그 동안 자신이 쌓아왔던 노하우와, 주변의 지인들, 그리고 스스로를 돋보이기 위해서 자기계발을 하거나 인맥을 찾는 등의 노력한 흔적들이 자신을 더 열심히 뛰게 할 단서를 만들어준다.
우리는 이런 이중적인 복잡한 경쟁관계 속에서 결국 ‘나’라고 하는 상품을 어떻게 각색하고 포장하면 좋을지에 대한 고민을 하게 된다.
<당신 참 괜찮은 사람이야, 양창순>
<나는 까칠하게 살기로 했다, 양창순>
그래도 나는 사람을 믿기로 했다.
의미있는 삶을 사는 것은 능력이 아니라 선택이다.
남에게 상처주면서 옳은 일인양 당당했던 적은 없었는지...
<명문장의 조건, 김성우>
아름다움은 아득히 먼 곳에서 빛나는 별빛 같은 것. 가까이 다가가면 신기루처럼 사라지는 것
나는 이 편지를 짧게 할 한가한 시간이 없기 때문에 길게 쓴다. / 파스칼
--- 짧게 쓰는 데 더 긴 시간이 걸리는 것이 문장이다
말을 돈처럼 써라. 말에 인색하기를 돈에 인색하듯 하라. / 중국 옛말
말을 낭비 말라. / 라틴어 격언
--- 말을 조심하라는 뜻도 있겠지만 문장에 낱말을 돈처럼 아끼라는 말이기도 하다.
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